From Rock Bottom to Redemption: The Messy Story Behind Our Marriage
This is the story of our rock bottom. It’s muddled and messy and less than pretty. But it ends in redemption. We share this intimate slice of our lives in hopes of encouraging you, no matter your circumstances. We’re glad you’re here. So please, read on, and know that as a family who’s been to rock bottom and back, we stand with you in whatever suffering you face.
I’ll never forget the day, I packed our three kids into the family SUV and moved out. In that moment, our picture-perfect American dream shattered like the frail sheet of glass it was.
Word got out. Rumors spread. And the unsolicited, unhelpful advice began pouring in.
I was a hot mess. I remember crying out to God, soaking the floor with my tears, sucking dust bunnies up to my face.
But while most people ran out on us, my pastor, his wife, and a handful of others ran into our mess. Brothers and sisters in Christ bore our burdens [Galatians 6:2].When I felt like dredging up the ugly past and dwelling in memories, they pointed me toHis promises.
The Word became alive and active in my life like never before. It carried me through that season, minute-by-minute.
My life was like a house under construction; God was tearing out its rotten wood and rebuilding it into something beautiful [Isaiah 61:4]. He was moving in my muck.I just needed to hold on.
For fourteen months, we remained separated. Strapped for money, Chris stayed in a garage belonging to Charlie, a man we had just met through our pastor.
When Chris would come back from work, Charlie would be waiting for him to talk about his day, ask about our family, and read Scripture to him.
Aggravated, Chris started to come home later and later. He just wanted to be “miserable and alone,” as he now admits. But Charlie was steadfast; he’dwait up no matter how late Chris returned.
One night after a therapy session, Chris came home to Charlie, as usual. Frustrated, he asked, “Why do you ask about my family? I’ve never had someone care about me unless I had drugs or a party to go to. Why do you care?”
“Because I was just like you once,” Charlie explained. “I care because Jesus cares about me, and He cares about you, too.”
That night was the turning point. Kneeling on an oil-stained floor all alone in a garage, which served as his makeshift living arrangements during this season. Beside him were a couple Harleys and a Corvette, Chris cried out to Godin utter surrender. Peace flooded his heart and hushed his mind. And there at rock bottom, he experienced total redemption. Years of prayer & God’s promise was fulfilled [2 Peter 3:9].
There were countless times when I felt like throwing in the towel and starting life over. But my God-sent community taught me to follow His wisdom instead of my unreliable emotions.
So if you’re in a tough spot right now, in marriage or in life, we want to step into your mess, just like our community stepped into ours.
Please feel free to send a prayer request our way. We don’t need all the details; God already knows them. But if you do feel led to share details, know that they are confidential with us.
So thanks for reading our story. We want to overcomethe50% divorce rate, because we believe that a redeemed Christian marriage brings glory to God. So hold on;the best is yet to come. He’s holding you and your situation in His ever-capablehands.
Through much grit and His grace,
Niki Chiles